Let’s be very, very clear. Trauma Informed is not Trauma Educated. Complex Ptsd is not the same as Ptsd. Life Coaching is not Trauma Educated. Therapists are not Trauma Educated unless they’ve done continued Education.
For me, it became abundantly clear years ago I needed more than the average therapist. I sat explaining to my then therapist “look, I’m functioning externally, have a part time job, kids, husband, home, but there is something wrong inside of me. I don’t know what, and I’m asking for help.” They looked at me and replied “you’re doing better than any of my other clients, you’ll be fine.” I can’t begin to explain the pain of having to get up out of the chair, putting on the sunshiny smile, the mask of strength, and having to return to pretending “everything’s fine, I can manage.”
AND I KNOW I’M NOT ALONE IN THIS EXPERIENCE.
“Recovery takes place within the context of relationships; it doesn't happen in isolation. To believe we are better off alone is a Trauma Response."
Linda Meredith, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach
WHICH IS WHY I WANT TO OFFER THESE FOUR SUGGESTIONS TO THOSE WHO NEED THEM:
1. TURN OFF THE CHRISTMAS CAROLS IF YOU’RE NOT IN THE MOOD, AND DON’T GO TO THAT PARTY IF YOU DON’T WANT TO.
2. IF YOU’RE GRIEVING, UNDERSTAND THAT THE PAIN ASSOCIATED WITH IT IS PERFECTLY NATURAL.
3. IF THE SEASON IS MAKING YOU FEEL LONELY, GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO BE BRAVE ENOUGH TO REACH OUT TO SOMEONE. REACH OUT HERE IN GROUP WHERE YOU WILL BE MET WITH LOVE AND SUPPORT. YES, WE ARE A RECOVERY GROUP, BUT MIXED IN THERE, IS ALWAYS SUPPORT.
4. IF THERE ISN’T A SPECIFIC PERSON YOU WANT TO REACH OUT TO, DON’T BE AFRAID TO CHOOSE TO BE ALONE WITH INTENTION.
NONE OF THESE ACTIVITIES WILL MAKE YOUR PAIN GO AWAY, BUT THEY WILL ENSURE YOU HAVE THE SPACE YOU NEED TO GRIEVE SAFELY AND IN A SPIRIT OF LOVE.
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