Have you ever been to a Therapist who has minimised, made small of, your childhood trauma. OR had a Therapist say “you come from a very trashy background” or even this “you’re drinking caused the abuse.” All of these responses, and more, were said to members of our global family by therapists, and I was devastated for them.
How can we begin to identify a good Complex Trauma Coach/Therapist?
How can we absolutely identify if a Trauma Coach and/or Therapist is going to be able to take us from Survivor to Thriver? Especially when Complex Trauma coaching/therapy has to be applied differently for each individual?
Answer: We need to know what questions to ask
The following questions will help you determine if the Coach/Therapist will be able to assist you in your recovery. They are Complex Ptsd Recovery specific.
I’ve put together this infographic you can download and save to your phone from the Free Complex Ptsd Resource Library. This will make it easier to have on hand whether you’re in person, on the phone or checking out the Coach/Therapists website.
These questions are all Complex Trauma specific because they will help you know the Coach/Therapist can meet your needs to advance in your recovery.
What does “advance in your recovery” mean?
This means you will not be spending endless years in coaching/therapy and not getting any better. Complex Ptsd recovery happens when we are Equipped with information, Educated on what we need to know and Encouraged and supported in a safe environment to take your one next step.
There are other questions we need to ask as well.
If we look at our Coach/Therapist as a potential relationship then we can feel comfortable to ask questions about their way of practicing.
I assembled some more essential questions available for free here. You’ll be able to download the pdf OR download the infographics to your phone to have them on hand. All free.
Use the questions to scan their website and see if they are upfront in answering your initial questions without having to contact them. There is no room for games in Complex Ptsd recovery. Upfront and honest is what we need.
Now we know you can recover, your brain can heal, from Developmental Trauma you want the best person to walk with you.
Also look on their website for client reviews. These will help you discover what kind of Coach/Therapist you may work with. Looking at my client reviews you’ll notice key themes around how the work I do with clients, works.
Pay close attention to whether the Therapist is getting results. And also if they mention on going learning in Trauma as well. We don’t have a lot of time, but we do have a professional requirement to make time for continued education.
Asking questions may not be something we’ve learnt to do as adults due to our developmental trauma, but it is something we can learn to do.
Have you considered your needs when working with a Coach/Therapist?
This is a tough one. How can we identify our needs in a Coach/Therapist?
If you can, sit with your feelings and write them down. See if they sound similar to these, and note your differences.
I need someone to feel safe with
I need someone who is an encourager
I need someone who will be empathic but also tell me what I need to know
I need someone who understands what I don’t understand as yet
I want someone who is caring
I want someone who knows how I feel.
If you’re having a hard time getting into your feelings that’s okay. Try writing this list out and feeling these feelings, then keep writing after you’ve written the last one on the list.
This is a healthy way of getting in touch what what you need AND what you want too. We are allowed to have both needs and wants in our potential long term relationships.
Please feel welcome to reach out to me if you have further questions. New information in treating Complex Ptsd is coming to hand frequently.
Blessings and dreams, they do come true!
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