Arriving into adulthood with childhood development trauma equips us with a variety of maladaptive behaviours & core beliefs not reflective of our truth, our authentic self. Unconsciously carrying deeply buried patterns & beliefs we ache to be free.
You are the sign you have been waiting for.
You are the sign you have been waiting for. It’s not in the stars, nor is it at the heart of everything synchronistic. It’s not stamped on the forehead of your beloved, nor is it lingering on the tip of the guru’s tongue. It’s not in the numerology, or the astrology, or floating on the wings of your angel-guides. It’s already here. It’s you. That you exist at all, with all the odds that were stacked against your incarnation, is evidence of your significance. So are all the gifts, callings and offerings that course through your veins. You are a signpost of miracle and wonder. It serves the shaming powers-that-be if you look for your signs outside of yourself, but you won’t find them there. You will find them in your own bones, right at the heart of your lived experience. After you clear the blinding clutter, you will realize that it was you all along. You are the sign that leads you home. Jeff brownJeff Brown
My Authentic Self
Do you have experiences and feelings of …
Purposely wear a mask in public and at home, wanting people to see the real us, frustrated we aren’t understood by others when we find the courage to speak, silent tears and private tears we hide as we do not want to be a burden to other people, seek deeply to raise our children differently to our upbringing, ache to be heard and just as terrified if we are heard of cynicism, the judgement, the lack of compassion and understanding surrounding us, constantly being told it’s our fault both verbally and nonverbally, empathic and people pleaser
Baffled why we love our families so deeply yet we can’t forge a healthy connection with them, we do everything we can for them yet their is no acknowledgement of our loving heart only where we fall short, we choose partners who wind up being emotional cripples, bitter and twisted and take it out on us and wonder how on earth we made this choice despite how educated we made ourselves about relationships, we can’t seem to locate the key to connection with others, disconnection seems to be the end result of relationships instead of deeper connections
What began as one challenge with our health increases into one more, plus one more until we’re so unwell we can’t work, we can’t manage our health anymore and we realise we need to address the root causes of the ill health. For some ill health takes years to manifest then knocks them out completely, for others it’s like a drip, drip, drip over time. For me it was a number of ill health factors that led to my being bedridden for over 2 years. The primary cause was decades of multiple stress plus epigenetic trauma passed down through the generations.
“Neuroscience research shows that the only way we can change the way we feel is by becoming aware of our inner experience and learning to befriend what is going on inside ourselves.”Bessel A. van der Kolk
My Story of Living with a Mask
The Crippling Cycle of Perfectionism
For me deep inside of me I felt like there was something fundamentally flawed or missing within me. I constantly felt different, alone and misunderstood in my daily life. Often not bothering to speak anymore because I couldn’t work out why these emotions kept bombarding me. So I ignored them, pushed them down, and kept wearing my perfect mask. The internal fear was crippling, primarily because I hid it all behind different the masks i.e. Miss Super Efficient, Miss Strong in All Things, Miss Able to get Shiz done in an instant. No matter what the every day challenges presented to me were I’d recognise the path through and make everything work together in an order. I truly believed I had to operate this way because of the constant internal nagging surrounding my internal flaw. I believed if anyone ever found out how incapable I truly was my life would be over, I’d be dead.
Looking at my life from the outside in, no one had any clue I felt this way and how much the stress drove me to remain seemingly perfect. Mind you Miss Perfect drove everyone nuts I’m sure because I never relaxed. I was always on constant alert. My GP at the time was absolutely floored that I had Post Natal Depression. His exact response “What? You? No way?!” Yes, me, and now we know from science why this happens due to developmental trauma. However, the post natal depression launched me into a period of time where I began to ask questions of “Who am I?” “Why am I here” and what is the meaning of everything I’m going through? I’d achieved all that my family upbringing had shown me was having “made” it in life – the full time job, the husband, the kid, the home, the car, so what else was there to life? And one day, in the kitchen, a still, quiet voice repeated “listen to your thoughts.” Knowing the idea wasn’t mine I began my internal journey of self discovery nearly 25 years ago. It’s a journey where we get to identify and consciously use the order of how our soul works and how we can use the order to precisely identify trauma parts and let them go in the now. We do not need to go back to the past as we are carrying the trauma with us daily.
When I had been bedridden for over 2 years, medically mismanaged, lost all of my cognitive functions i.e. couldn’t walk, talk, had no memory and needed a full time carer, My Authentic Self, the course, literally was my life saver. At the time there was no science available to me to explain what had happened for me to lose all ability to function as a wife, a mother, a counsellor, a friend and remain bedridden. I know as I searched high and low to try and find an explanation. Acquired brain injury came the closest but still did not fit . Without the course My Authentic Self I would never have reached a stage of recovery where I could walk and talk again, I would not have been able to identify what was happening for me and change it around, take the one next step, and I would not have been able to stand in the strength of who I am. Who I am is needed for the deepest of wounds, an abandonment wound, to be released from our deep inner core. Who I am, My Authentic Self the course, helped me gain strength, wisdom, courage, empathy, knowledge and a deeper faith and connection to the Divine. Without it I would still be lying in a bed not knowing what was my one next step. Without it I would not be living the plan and purpose for my life. I’m grateful beyond words. 💗
My Authentic Self Modules
Online Course Contents Discovering Who I Am.
- Introduction: Awakening My Authentic Self Includes visuals of our soul, understanding ourselves and how we take on information and more.
- Module 1: Thoughts Includes all process surrounding our thoughts as the first layer. How and why we need to listen to them, how to work with them and the important thoughts we need to identify.
- Module 2: Emotions Includes our emotional cycle, how we need to work with our thoughts and emotions, what we need to identify and more.
- Module 3: Limits Building on our thought and emotions we unpack how to identify our limits, how we are going to work with them, what they will teach us, and this module we begin to truly experience the impact the course is having on and within us.
- Module 4: Patterns Learning how to identify our patterns, what we need to work with, and then literally experiencing them in our daily life is very powerful and life changing. We begin to dig deeper into the rhythm of our soul.
- Module 5: Beliefs Each Module, each week, we’ve built our internal awareness of each internal layer and this week we can have great courage in working with and identifying the layers of beliefs.
- Module 6: Redefining Relationships This Module helps us identify the exact place internally where we remain stuck in toxic, dysfunctional relationships and how we can navigate to break free from them. It’s not an obvious logical answer, it’s a soul driven unfolding, a knowing that sets us free in strength.
- Module 7: Chaos The most challenging and most rewarding Module for me was learning how to identify and navigate Chaos. Why? Our lives have way less drama, and lots more love and adventure, less down time, and more productive time as we recognise Chaos quickly and break the cycle effectively.
- Module 8: Letting Go After we have identified Chaos we move into Letting Go. You’ll learn how to identify what you need for the process of Letting Go, how it frees up your life in strength, and ultimately opens new doors towards your Purpose Driven Life. If we don’t learn how to let go we cannot see the new doors that begin to open for us.
- Module 9: A Purpose Driven Life A Step by Step understanding and the how to for you to begin developing and taking your next steps towards a Purpose Driven Life. Trauma Recovery gives us the gift of being able to help others in a myriad of areas, some of which may not be around yet. We learn to take the one next step knowing as we continue to do our internal journey we gain confidence in where we are headed in our individual life.
- Digital Workbooks for All Modules Each Module has a digital workbook you can use to follow along the video, use as reading material, and use for your daily self reflection. Once a week you’ll watch a video for approx. 30 mins, then each night you’ll fill in the prepared Soul Discovery worksheets to help you identify your unique internal process stopping you from living your Authentic Self.
My Authentic Self
Online Course Contents for Discovering Who I Am
- This Online Course contains 10 Video Tutorials and 10 Digital Manuals for charting your My Authentic Self Progess
- Watch 1 video per week and complete the Digital Manual as you integrate the knowledge and personal awareness into your daily life to help you discover who you are and build a purpose driven life.
- Can be used with or without a Mental Health professional. All instructions are contained in the Digital Manual
Frequently Asked Questions
Here’s what You Need to Know
- When does the Course start & finish? The course starts now and is available whenever you are ready, always. The benefit of being online is you pace yourself, it literally fits into your daily life.
- How long do I have access to the course? How does lifetime access sound? After enrolling, you have unlimited access to this course for as long as you like – across any and all devices you own.
- Can I use the course whilst working with a Professional? Yes. Taking in your notes and observations to your Mental Health Care professional will help you make further progress through recovery.