The fear, the sense of terror, the anxiety riddling my body just never made sense as an adult.
I’d ask myself repeatedly why couldn’t I manage “normal” adult responsibilities? Why couldn’t I get into a routine and keep it? Why did other people scare the living daylights out of me on one hand but on the other hand we could be instant friends? Quite frankly none of it made any logical sense at all.
One of the most triggering questions in the world is the innocently well intentioned “Why don’t you just…?” question-suggestion-judgment. It feels like an attack when it is actually meant as a suggestion. Inevitably, it’s asked by someone who does not understand the struggle I am feeling, the tempest inside, or the helplessness that is just bubbling under the surface.
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